I Love My Husband, Hate His Politics
The last week my husband has just snapped and told me that I have ruined his life and he hates me because i caged him up, he had no life and my insecurities have driven him away. Our sex life became non existent, which rightly or wrongly made me feel insecure about a few things and now he is so angry, he tells me he doesn’t like me and that i can never change so he won’t want to be with me. He has been to the doctor and was prescribed Amitriptyline. He said we need to separate so he can sort himself out. I don’t know what to do….
Did your husband say he hates everything about his life? During arguments, your husband always likes to say how much better he would be without committing to a marriage. He hates and grumbles over almost everything like money, no space to breathe, had enough of your nagging, etc. What does he mean? Is this a sign to tell you he wants you out of the marriage and may be thinking of leaving you?
My husband wants to split. He said he loves me but is not in love with me any more. We are still in the marital home, which is sold subject to contract, and it is extremely difficult. We have been together for 30+ years, and married for most of those. But he has completely shut me out of his life, and it’s as though he hates me.
We were going through a rough patch, but I thought we were working through it. I am absolutely devastated. I love him so much, and it’s destroyed me watching him turn into someone I don’t recognize – a stranger. He is completely normal with everyone else – it’s just me he hates.
This is common in many marriages especially when things become a routine. Many people could not accept the changes when they have more things to commit to in a marriage. The fact in real life is when couples settle down and start a new life of their own, they will have more commitments. Commitments could be from stuff related to money, children, parents and spouses. It is no longer about deciding what you want in your way and there are more considerations to think of before deciding something important. For some, it is harder to accept the changes and they may feel depressed when they do not see all these as progresses and challenges. Depending on how they look at the situation, some see the changes as a new challenge towards another life; some see it as stress and a burden.
You probably could have also realized your husband is reacting in a totally different way for no reason and shows disinterest in sex. As he hates his life, he may tend to do things that could hurt your feelings. His resentment may also worsen your relationship with him and though you see him every day, both of you seem to be drifting apart instead. If all these signs are appearing in your marriage right now, this shows that you must do something immediately. Even if your husband is not having an affair, it still does not mean everything is great in your marriage.
It is obvious that your husband is going through an emotional roller coaster. At this point of time, it is important to control your emotions. Further bad feelings like quarrels could actually cause more frictions. It is important to avoid doing anything to provoke him further. Even pleading him to change is not advisable because you will only lose your dignity and respect by doing that.
Hatred from a husband is a sure sign of changes and difficulties in your marriage. You will need to analyze and find out the real problems that are causing him to behave this way and take steps to improve your marriage.
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